Weaknesses

Your moment of weaknesses

Saturday, May 31, 2008 @ 10:43 AM

D-E-A-D

things just never get right ,
only worst .

i find it so hard to breath now , idk .
quarrel with mummy early in the morning , almost tearing the whole house down .
whatever , i don't give a damn now .
tuition at 1 , I'm rushing my homework now

after that , i think I'm going MIA
i don't know where i want to go too .

I want to rest , a good rest , a long long/forever rest (:

Friday, May 30, 2008 @ 9:35 PM

On the verge of exploding .
super piss/angry !

everything that i come in contact with ,
regardless living thing or non-living thing .
i will just scold them upside-down
or rather fuck them upside-down .

i have never been so angry .
don't ask me why , cause i think there is no need for me to say out whats the fucking reason .

i just fucking hell need a rest ,
have been having fever since Monday .
spare me from those fucking tears/anger/sadness/whatever-it-is .

fuck it all .

Thursday, May 29, 2008 @ 10:16 PM

everything that i come in contact with just look so dead .

lesson from 9-1130 tomorrow .
after that city with Xy .

@ 4:15 PM

everything just seems so wrong .
idk where to start .
I'm trying to smile ,
someone just make me happy can ?

Monday, May 26, 2008 @ 5:44 PM

FUCKED UP .

Sunday, May 25, 2008 @ 8:37 PM

I lost everything in an blink of eye ,
I'm back to square one .

Not even give a choice , fair ?
stuck in between my parents&you .
its either them or you .
sorry , forgive me .
i choose them over you .

i cried like shit , seriously .
its like , i lost a part of me when i gave up the best thing i even had .
more then reluctant to let go , i still let it go .
i know i was cruel , i had no choice .
forgive me , though i know , I'm not worth your forgiveness
&the decision is to let you go is definitely right .
at least you won't suffer with me .
i want you to be happy , I'm not worth .
blame me if you want , i don't mind . cause i know I'm wrong .

for 1 month plus ,
every night without fail , two hours of ranting&scoldings
i tolerated , i hide from everybody .
thinking that , one day , they will accept .
no ! hell wrong !
things just go worst , so wrong .
at times , in the night , when i go out to the kitchen , i look down the window .
i think to myself , let everything just come to an end can ?

tired , really tired .
family , you , studies , friends , dance
I'm just a 15 going 16 ,
i can fcuking hell take the weight of so much things .
i will break down
&i have already break down .

that choice was given me so suddenly ,
i didn't know how to react to it .
didn't want to affect your exam ,
but i failed .
i hope that you wont get affected .
i have nothing to say ,
just that letting go would make things easier .

smile though the tears ,
i want to be strong but i just fcuking hell cried every where i go
major breakdown this afternoon ,
i don't know how long i cried ,
but JO , thanks for lending me your shoulder , i know i wet it , totally .
XINYI honey , thanks for the concern , i really really appreciate it
XY , thanks for spending time with me this afternoon , even though you know there is a major paper tomorrow .
SH , thanks for trying to stop me from crying .

i won't blame my parents ,
i won't disobey my parents .
but , i just find it hard to adapt to what i am now .

again , sorry for hurting you .

Saturday, May 24, 2008 @ 4:31 PM

how far will everything stretched ,
till the end of my patience or tolerance ?

yesterday was disastrous,
SS, English oral then Chinese remedial .
i wrote really really a lot for SS , though i did not study.
i even wrote one whole page for question 1c
i have no confidence passing that paper though .
&again , i blabber a lot of shit to Mrs Bala during oral .
Chinese remedial was pretty fine .
went home right after that .

Brother gave me a call&asked me to go down immediately
because ... there is nobody at the studio to cook lunch for him .
such an arse he is !
dance was okays , the kids put all their effort in everything they do .
i can see that , thanks to all (:

crazy times after that ! :D
true or dare is loveeeeee (:
all i could said was , it was really crazy
i dare sally to go topless&she really went topless !
OMG ! i thought only JO&me is that crazy and daring when it comes to game .
i guess , we found a new partner (:

bused home with ming jie, he can't stop drumming on his plastic file
i told him that i would turn him into doreamon if he continue druming .
hehs , finger-less .
home&slept

tuition this noon , revision for Tuesday mock test .
met JO, Darryl&Aaron that
dance planning&chilling at coffee bean now
using Darryl lappie to update .
Aaron is being a kapo ! a big big one .
&Jo is so engross reading her book .
being a loner , i kept poking aaron who is sitting beside me
he knows i'm moodless , so i started my blabbering
Darryl&Jo is not listening to my blabbering .
&darryl is happily drinking his ice latte ,
i hope he get choke !

there is something seriously wrong ,
i hope you can sense/feel it .
i'm extremely tired holding on, everything is stressing me out !
give me a break&let me be alone

Monday, May 12, 2008 @ 9:44 PM

all of the sudden , i don't know how to smile ,
i don't know how to laugh.
yes , i was smiling&laughing all the way today .
but , do you guys know how much i bleed inside ?
i don't like the feeling of being doubt ,
i don't like the feeling of not able to think probably .
i hate the numbness

i went totally crazy this afternoon when i reach home ,
i took out all the fruits in my fridge&cut them into cubes .
&i only realised that after i pack them nicely .
so , i called Jo&told her , i 'cook' her dinner for her
she happily came over to my house&i passed her a big box of fruits .
she almost strangled me to death .

everything seems to be going haywire .
can some kind soul out there come&rearrange the wires ?

@ 5:45 PM

TIRED ~

I'm going to take a short nap now
will continue to edit my profile&update more later .

that pain is killing me ..

Thursday, May 8, 2008 @ 10:05 PM

just give me a stab ,
i can't stop the tears from flowing .

Monday, May 5, 2008 @ 3:52 PM

I can give you nothing but love&affection&all the attention you need .
I have never been so blessed until we got together .
I love you without reason and that is reason enough .
You could put all the hearts together in the world
&that still wouldn't describe how much I love you

Happy 1st month anniversary (:

i won't be updating that often lately ,
though i'm always not updating .
I'm super moodless now ):

My lappie just died on me a few days ago .
perhaps getting it back on wednesday ?

takecare people (:

profile

J-min

05Oct1992 Craziness&laughters are my daily medicine
My world revolves around my ,
BOYFRIEND (:
KOHXINYI HONEY
Jo Bitch;Queenie

Fairytale, Vintage, Leona Lewis , Flowers, Laughters, Girlfriends, Tuilips, Dance, Rainbow&lilies

I blog what i want ,
If you aren't happy
or any content irritates you
, then go away (:

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